Double, Double, Toil and Trouble

Fire burn and cauldron bubble.  Shakespeare really has nothing to do with what I’m going to talk about, but I was feeling the quote.  And actually, cauldron bubbling sort of fits, depending on how you look at things.  Maybe it is apropos.

I’ve debated back and forth whether or not to put this on my blog.  But it came down to this – I like to feel I’ve connected with at least a few people out there in blogland and I look at this as sharing since it will affect my “blog” life as well as my real life.  Plus it helps me to write out my feelings.  I’m not always good about expressing my feelings, especially verbally, but writing does help me to get my feelings out.

Boy, am I babbling on or what?  I’m avoiding getting to the topic even in this forum.  Deep breath and go!  I’ve been thinking about what I was going to say (if it came to this, which unfortunately it has) for some time now.  (Although this has been happening rather quickly, so the phrase “some time” is relative…)  Come to what, you may be wondering.  Without getting into too many details, there is something inside of me that needs to come out.  And it will be coming out via surgery.  This situation will put quite the damper on what was promising to be a fun summer of racing.  As in no Danskin for sure (and a few other smaller races) and no Tower of Terror 10 Miler either.  (The prelim recovery time I’ve been told is around 6 to 8 weeks.)

Color me devastated (which I think would be an orangey color, but a sad orangey color, not a happy one).  Well, devastated is probably too strong of a word to use.  But I am very disappointed.  (And, didn’t I just go through recovery for my knee?  Here we go again.)

I’m most disappointed to give up on Tower of Terror 10 Miler – an inaugural race at Disney World where I was going to dress up as the Queen of Hearts for the race, attend Mickey’s Not So Scary Halloween Party (hopefully as Ariel on land as my costume), meet up (again!) with Fruit Fly (which, by the way you aren’t off the hook FF – I am determined we will one day do a runDisney race together! 🙂 ) and perhaps meet up with a few other peeps going (maybe Sara or Abby?).  And then boom!  Initially I was thinking maybe, just maybe, I would be able to still do the race.  But then reality settled in.  You can’t rush things and that would be rushing my healing for sure.  Granted I could still go to WDW for the weekend, but given the recovery time I’ve been given, and the fact I will probably be super pouty the whole time if I do go and can’t race, I am thinking the best thing would be for me not to go.  (Cue the big, long, drawn out sigh.)

The Tower of Terror 10 Miler should be there next year, right?  So what if I don’t run in the inaugural (as a 10 Miler) race?  And I’ll have to miss Mickey’s Not So Scary Halloween Party, but maybe that means I get to do Mickey’s Christmas Party this year.  Bright side, people.  I am looking for a bright side.

I am not yet ready to give up on Las Vegas Rock N Roll.  I’m not fully committing one way or the other at this point.  (I’m slowly coming to grips that I might have to give it up or think about walking it, rather than running.)  I’ll need to wait and see how recovery goes, and how I feel, but I’ve got about 4 months.  That should totally be enough time, right?  Right now, I’m playing it by ear.  (Random funny – when you try to pantomime play it by ear to your mom, she might think you mean hit it out of the park.)  Why am I even bothering to think this far in advance or even think about races?  One thing to know about me is I am a planner.  Actually that should be Planner with a capital P and maybe with a capital LANNER as well!  And also, having the race out there on the horizon gives me hope, gives me something to look forward to, and something to work towards.

So there you go.  Life can change in the blink of an eye, or in the reading of a test result.  Fortunately I have a trip to Disneyland coming up, right before my procedure!  So yay!  That will definitely help.  And Princess Half Marathon registration opened as well!  I wasn’t planning on signing up this early, but I needed something else to look forward to and to motivate me so I signed up.  Even better – Art of Animation is host hotel, so guess where I’m staying! 🙂  If I do end up not being able to Vegas, I will for sure be doing Princess!

Right now I’m just focusing on a positive outcome and removing any doubts or what if scenarios from my mind.  (I don’t recommend researching too much on the internet.  There is some scary stuff out there.  However, I did Google when I could start running after similar procedures and got answers that varied from 6 weeks to 6 months.)

Moral of the story is get checkups regularly (which I am certainly guilty of procrastinating on making doctors appointments).  I will accept any and all prayers.

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5 Responses to Double, Double, Toil and Trouble

  1. Jana says:

    It’s just a blip. You’ll be back to your races and probably stronger than ever before you know it! love ya…

  2. Heidi Hottinger says:

    I’m so sorry to hear of your disappointment! I DO know, as last year I couldn’t do the the Danskin because of my bike crash and CONCUSSION. But now Saturday was a year since that event, and I’ve got 2 of 5 planned triathlons done, and am doing (2) 10Ks in August (hopefully) and then (hopefully) my first ‘half’ in September. You WILL come back!!! Be of good cheer! (To follow on the line of pithy quotes…)

  3. FruitFly says:

    Well bummer for you! 😦 I was really looking forward to some Disney time with the other Disney freak — but you are right, plenty of runDisney chances in the future and I bet we’ll both be at at least one of them together! I hope everything goes well, I’ll be sending all positive vibes in your direction for sure!

  4. Hey Emily, sounds like it’ll be a frustrating process for sure, but you’ll be back on your feet again in no time!

  5. Abby says:

    Positive vibes your way, lady! I’m so sorry to hear this. I know how heartbreaking not being able to do things you want to do. Boo.

    Good news? I’m signing up for Princess, too! I think it’s always a good plan to have something to look forward to 🙂

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